Zeta One

I can't say enough good things about this supremely cheap, thoroughly trashy movie.  Zeta One (a.k.a. The Love Factor) is exactly the kind of weirdo movie I try to seek out.

The plot (I hesitate to use that word) concerns a collective of space women who aren't actually from space.  They brainwash Earth women into their group.  But they are all brainwashed Earth women... from space.  An agent is dispatched to get information from a woman who knows about this group and its leader, Zeta.  But the informant never shows up.  He finds that she's been kidnapped and is a member of Zeta's group.  He goes to save her, but her fellow "space women" save her first.  The end.

I yelled "what is going on?!" a lot during this movie.  And the answer turned out to be: nothing.  Nothing is going on.  The first 20 minutes of the movie is a man and a woman playing a game of strip poker.  Every hand and every bet is shown.  The zany music playing negates any sexiness that might creep into this scene.  Eventually, the man and woman end up in bed together.  The man is a secret agent and the woman convinces him to tell her about his most recent assignment.  The rest of the movie is a flashback with occasional stops wherein the woman questions the narrator's truthfulness.

And she should question it!  During the vast majority of the events he's describing, he's in bed with another woman waiting for his informant to arrive.  This actor is in bed with a naked blonde for over half of the run time.  His character couldn't know what was happening with almost any of the other characters.  

But don't look for logic in Zeta One.  This is a bizarre attempt to make a James Bond movie with actual nudity.  The problem is that the filmmakers where so busy trying to get the sci-fi/comedy parts right (they fail) plus shoehorn in enough nudity to sell tickets (they totally succeed), that the secret agent ends up not doing anything.  He literally has nothing to do with the events of the story.

I loved this movie.  I love how it blends psychedelia with London in the Swinging 60s.  The influence of Barbarella on this movie is huge (and that is a very good thing).  I love that the "space women" just point their hands at people and they die.  I'm sure somebody thought that was going to be awesome.  "They don't have guns; they shoot with their hands!"  The final result of that idea is hilarious.  Plus, the final payoff is so ridiculously badass that I rewound it twice.  Once because I couldn't wrap my head around it and once because I loved it so much.

This is super highly recommended for lovers of "so bad it's good" cinema.  It's inept and trashy and fun.  A must watch for camp movie viewers.

3 out of 10 (in terms of real quality, but 9 out of 10 for weirdo enjoyment!)